Meet Maureen Nicol.
New York based single mom to be, full-time PHD student and a doctoral fellow at Columbia University, and a freelance model. We sat down to hear Maureen’s authentic truth, her story, her advice, her love. We hope that this conversation either guides you before becoming a mom or inspires you as a mom to know that you aren’t alone. #MomToMom
Q: What is it like being a full-time student while also expecting your first child?
It’s been something else. The first trimester I was very sick, but I feel like I was more sick than most people, and also I was in transition from Texas to New York and to a new educational program. It was definitely a lot going on at one time. I honestly feel like I slept through the first trimester. It’s interesting because my school is a school of education, which you think would be more welcoming, but a lot of the women are a bit standoffish and not supportive. It’s just hard having to negotiate and fight for what really just seems fair. The issue is what happens when your only identity isn’t just a student? Like you’re about to be a mother you know? I think that is tough. A colleague I know is doing research on how mothers make it through the program. One professor even told her after she had a baby, “oh you had so much potential.” Things people say where you are like okay...c’mon why are we still having to navigate and deal with this in 2020?
Q: How do you intend to balance and/or harmonize the two worlds that are having a baby and fighting for the respect that you deserve within the educational space?
A few weeks ago it was my birthday, and I was thinking about my 34th year of life, and I think what this baby has taught me is that I need to submit to life. I need to be given into it - not in a way that is helpless, but submit to the opportunities, submit to the people who want to show up for you, just submitting to the options that come my way which means it can be very scary in the sense of not knowing what is to come. I am not going to kill myself to finish a program, but I am also not going to lose time with my child. I am going to be real and honest and see what I need in the time and the moment. If I can’t sustain my life or provide for my child because I am a full-time student, I will go get a job somewhere and figure it out. I’m not trying to set myself up with insanely lofty goals. I just want to be happy and know that it is going to work out.
Q: What career are you looking to have after receiving your PHD?
I was trying to figure out where I want to go with this, and I decided I need a profession that combines education, equity work, creativity, and community organizing -- so what that could look like is being a director of a children’s museum or a position that is higher up that makes me feel connected to children and communities, but doesn’t make me feel like I have to compromise on my beliefs or my identity. I want to work with children and families in different ways.
Q: What has your journey as a single mother been like for you?
This whole journey it feels like I have been walking around and I have no skin on. Everyone is telling me to be vulnerable and open and to show every part of me, but it sort of makes life harder for me. I feel like I’ve been walking around naked, begging or asking for the things I deserve while trying to keep my heart soft. I think it’s preparing me, but it’s preparing me to still be hopeful because I think the beginning of this process kind of made me feel like I was losing hope in people, but now I have to train people how to treat me, and I am trying to see it that way verses losing hope in people sometimes.
Q: What was it like when you found out you were pregnant, and how has that experience been for you?
For two years I dated a man who I met when I lived in New Orleans. We decided to do long distance when I moved to Texas for school, but I kept seeing patterns of me doing a lot of the emotional work. I felt like it wasn’t working, so we went on a break for a while. We decided to start seeing each other again and met up in Los Angeles, and the few days we were together, we slept together… a few weeks later I found out I was pregnant. It still didn’t feel right with him, and I think he was thinking the baby would keep us together. I just couldn’t keep asking him for things that he didn’t have the emotional capacity to give me. He told me he would get better.
At the time I was living in Austin, and we drove together to NY so that he could help me get settled and move (literally a week after finding out I was pregnant). It was so interesting. Everything he was doing during that drive and when I got settled, I realized I really couldn’t do it anymore. Since then we haven’t been together, and he kind of colored my pregnancy in a lot of ways. I think he was so angry at me that he said very hurtful things to me that shifted from how happy he was when he first found out, to telling me I was morally wrong for keeping the baby etc. I didn’t feel attached to the baby because I felt like maybe I was making the wrong decision. Maybe I shouldn’t keep the baby, and should I really keep it alone.
Then by week 20 I really felt it. I was like I am doing this. This is a blessing. I am strong. He can have a choice to not be involved, but I can also have a choice to keep this child. Then I started talking to the baby more and feeling more connected. I made a baby registry and started seeking out resources for people in my position. Doulas of color, breastfeeding coaches - just trying to find the people that would answer my questions, so I wouldn’t feel so alone because I am in this new city by myself and pregnant.
I don’t want to say I am a super religious person because I am not, but I believe in things and maybe God, and I was in a very sad place at University of Texas, and I was in a sad place in my relationship, and I was far from family. But now I am in New York and my family lives 3 hours away in Maryland, and I feel like God just knew to give me a baby when I was in a happier place and closer to my family.
What does being a mom mean to you? Especially before even being a mom?
It’s really interesting. I think about it in the sense of the way my mom has mothered me, and now, even though I don’t have my baby in my hand, thinking about motherhood. I was really sad on Valentine’s Day, but then my baby started kicking, and I realized that I am not alone. My mom always calls me to check in, and I think she does it because she knows she always has a friend and always has someone. For me it’s this idea of creating someone and knowing that you don’t have to be alone anymore, and I think that is really special. Randomly I was parking my car in a valet the other day and this guy said, “Have you checked out this bar?,” and I was like, “I can’t drink right now, I’m pregnant.” And then he started talking about when his mom gave birth, and that she said it was like having her best friend. Then he told me, “I feel like your baby is going to think that too, cause you just seem so kind.” It was just this beautiful moment, and idea of always having a friend hopefully. That’s what I hope to find as a mom.
Q: Do you have any fears around bringing this baby into the world?
It’s weird because I don’t want to say they are necessarily fears, but the “fears” that I think about manifest in logistical day to day things. Everyone says the lack of sleep is going to be crazy or breastfeeding is wild. I just want to know if it’s all true, and if it’s going to be my experience. Am I really going to be so sleep deprived I don’t remember my name? And then there’s these little things like how I have a dog. What if my baby is sleeping and I need to walk my dog, and I just started crying not knowing what the answer to that is. It is kind of this idea of can I do this?
It’s hard too because people are quite judgmental. If I had a dollar for every time in one day people say, “you’re going to breastfeed right?” Those questions really bother me because yes I will breastfeed, and yes I want that connection with my baby, but also, why are you asking me things about my body? I don’t like this idea of my body being a space of question and judgment for everyone, and how I choose to respond to that then impacts how they see me as a mom.
Q: Is there any advice that you’re looking to receive from a community of moms or that you have learned from your experience?
I am curious how moms re-center their friendships or create new ones around this space or this new journey, because what I’m finding is that I am the first of my friendship group who is having a baby. I am curious how people have managed to keep their friends, how to treat them with loving boundaries, and also how my friends can be there for me? I just want to find people with similar journey’s –– which is the first thing people told me to do. Find mom groups. I also want to know how mom’s figure out how to be completely loving to their kids and there for them and be present, without compromising who they are as women and what they want to be like. What kind of work does that take? Yes I am a mother, but I am also other things.
All photography done by Daniela Buvat, check her out here!
We are going to continue posting more of these authentic stories, so like, comment, and share to your friends! If you know someone that you think would be a good fit for these interviews, please reach out to us at hello@allthebabies.co so we can tell their story and keep creating a #MomToMomMovement.
all the babies.
29 comments
What is the first ways to Join illuminati to get Rich, Power & Fame (( 256758471138 )).
No matter how much the rich have, they always want more. And the richer you are, the more you get. And the more you get, the less others get, so you are actively making the poor poorer. Isn’t that the world we live in? That’s how we have the 1% versus the 99%. They will take everything from us, unless we take it all back from them. The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will. call +256758471138
OUR GOAL is to free minds from the chains they’ve been confined to. We know that the masses are awakening, and that they’re ready to get rid of what holds human civilization back. We all die. The goal isn’t immortality, it’s to create something, a system or a future, that is. Be a part of something bigger, and get rewarded generously for it. {256758471138}
=Benefits of Being an Illuminati Member
There are many benefits of being an Illuminati member apart form Wealth Power Fame and Protection we also provide you with the opportunity to fellowship and share knowledge with other members. It also gives you the opportunity to mentor those who want to achieve wealth and overall well-being. The members are reminded to appreciate ethics, morality and principles, while others find satisfaction in advancing their positions within the society.
Over the years, the Order has become a popular topic for movies, novels, websites, and even video games. From the Great Depression, which was ultimately necessary, to world wars. In many people’s minds, the Order idea ties in with the New World Order, a current political idea about a one-world government, religion, and financial system. The New World Order is the outward goal and we are the secret power working behind the scenes to achieve it.
Many pseudo-entertainers are aware of Illuminati legends and work those symbols and myths into their acts to fuel further speculation. Supporters of this idea say organizations like the United Nations, European Union, the World Health Organization, the World Bank, International Monetary Fund, G-20 Economic Group, the World Court, NATO, Council on Foreign Relations, World Council of Churches and various multinational corporations are pawns of the New World Order, nudging the world closer and closer to this socialist, one-economy, one-religion future.
The Four (4) Member Levels of Illuminati La Council Consists of:
1-Multi-millionaires
2-Global Leaders
3-Members of Royal Families
4-Most of successful musician
5-Current Highest Ranking Members of The Most Powerful Clubs, Organizations and Associations in the World
=1. Rich and Famous:
The Illuminati does control the entertainment industry. If instant you need fame and free money you need to sell your soul to Lucifer buy making ritual sacrifice of any nature. however the more blood sacrifice you make is the more riches and fam. make your dream come true by joining illuminati today.
=2. Religion:
The Illuminati will buy or help you sell your soul, and ritual sacrifice is required to join. The Illuminati is a nonreligious organization in exactly the same way that governments should be nonreligious. This calls a pone all the religious believers who need extra powers and forces to join illuminati today to make things the way you may need it to be.
There are many Illuminated groups, with different kinds of secret knowledge. Anything you might say about them (including this) will be false for some of the Illuminati, but true for others, which only adds to the confusion and mystery. {+256758471138} or atallcountries@gmail.com
Fertility Blessing Spells for a safe Pregnancy and Healthy Baby +256763059888
Are You Ready to get Pregnant, is the Clock Starting to Tick Pretty Loudly for You??? Does it Feel Like You are the Only One Struggling to Get Pregnant? If this is Your Situation, Let Your Worries of getting Pregnant be a Thing of the Past because my Fertility Spells will help you to Become Pregnant as soon as you want it. This powerful fertility spell it will give you 100% a beautiful children you dreams and your choice you want either a girl, a boy, twins like boy and girl, boys and girls just call Papa & Mama Grace to give a chance to talk God and Goddesses to ask children you want. No Need to Go to See the Fertility Statue when you Have My Magical fertility Spell Chants To Help guarantee You to have Baby or Babies you want in life.
Fertility Spell Pregnancy spells to increase fertility in both men & women increasing your chances to get pregnant Pregnancy spells too increase fertility in women & men. Get pregnant with twins or baby boy and baby girl after using pregnancy spells. Fertility spell to ensure that a couple has a safe pregnancy and without any problems or complications. call or WhatsApp +256763059888 to get your issue solved and be among those who are happy in life with there happy families. children is a key to make family call Pappa & Mama Grace to help you get pregnant and have a healthy baby children.
Pregnancy spells to help you have an easy delivery with as little pain as possible and no complications. Let my spiritual pregnancy protection spells protect your pregnancy and help you have a healthy pregnancy. Boost your potency & vitality with powerful pregnancy spells that work
If you want thinking about starting a family or increasing the size of your family then my fertility spells can help increase fertility by boosting you to get pregnant. Pregnancy spells can also be used to prevent or promote conception or fertility call or WhatsApp +256763059888
If you have difficulty conceiving order fertility & pregnancy spells to maximize fertility, heal infertility & help you have a health pregnancy. Heal weak erection problems in men, delay menopause in women & make it possible for a couple diagnosed as barren to have healthy children with fertility healing spells. call and WhatsApp me to get pregnant and give birth +256763059888 .((email)) at mamagraceandpapa@gmail.com
Is your Marriage Falling Apart? Save it with Powerful Spell call +256763059888
get best love spells from Papa and mama Grace true love spell caster. I can help you online using online spells or to come to my temples and this done internationally to help people all over the world who are suffering with relationship and marriage problems call Papa & Mama Grace at +256763059888
Bring Back Lost Love Prayer and powerful traditional herbs which makes your love to come back in 12 Hours, Losing someone you love is like breaking your heart in two, especially when you are deeply in love with that person. How to bring back lost love in a marriage of love links are made for all life, but there are things that can change all the way that love and that can bring back to their knees. Love is an essential emotion and has power to do everything happy and pleasant, but there comes a time when people are abandoned by their loved ones and are deceived, ltd., wrong and blamed. They reset the Bring Back Lost Love Prayer in 12 Hours these consequences are the result of the actions of couples or partners. But what are the reasons that cause this kind of situation? They restored the prayer love in this world; people are paying more attention to their social position and financial capacity, rather than ensure that their loved ones remain at his side. How to Bring Back Lost Love in the relationship is said that love can make everything easy and convenient. To pass or face any kind of problem, simpl have your lover at his side, but what if that person leaves you in the middle, a specialist in Calcutta vashikaran then what his reaction?? When people get cheated and left, then they lash out in fear and anger.
They are so affected by her lover act causing harm to them by harming your body and soul as well. But if such kind of things is happening to you, then you should come to us and get our prayer help. bring love again lost even if your partner is due to insufficient time had, misunderstandings due to mistrust, insecurity, love marriage specialist in joint family problems, children problems, Bring Back Lost Love Prayer in 24 Hours, bring back lost love free spell etc., then you can also get our help. We are here to help by using mantras and vashikaran call Papa & Mama Grace at +256763059888
CREATE A MARRIAGE
Have you been thinking of marriage? Want to commit fully and live the rest of your life with someone special? Maybe the person has already turned you down? With this spell your lover will accept! If combined with “Make someone love me” or “Faithfulness spell” it will give you a very good start on your marriage. WhatsApp / call Papa & Mama Grace at +256763059888
Marriage Spells
Marriage Spells are supposed to be very strong and effective. If you are in a relation and your lover is not committing or is taking time to decide if she or she or she wants to get married to you or not then these very strong marriage spells are used by which your love will marry you and you will have a very strong and happy married life. WhatsApp Papa & Mama Grace at +256763059888
Save My Marriage Spell
Please note that this spell is effective for any relationship that needs mending.)
Few things in life are more angst ridden than a relationship in disarray.
If your marriage appears headed for divorce, this is the time to activate positive spirits. Please see if the following applies to you:
1. Your mate is not the caring, loving person you once knew in the beginning of this relationship.
Hard times bring out the worst in people, and you feel you are being unjustly accused of wrongs you’ve never committed.
You know in your heart the relationship will work…if only the other person will put forth as much effort as you.
You are certain the two of you are meant to be together, and you fear your life will never be the same without him or her.
You must stop the downward spiral that is causing irreparable damage to your marriage. The Save My Marriage spell is an important step in re instituting laughter, trust and compatibility back to what you once had.
Have faith. For a spell to work, you must believe in the power of your magic. If you’re not convinced a spell to promote fertility and pregnancy is going to be useful, your attitude will have a negative impact on the process
life. Get your ex back, even if they are currently with another lover.
.For more information
Call /WhatsApp on +256763059888 and you can email : mamagraceandpapa@gmail.com.
https://powerfulspells.mgx.com
Most best top Love Spells to bring back your Lost Love call +256763059888.
.My powerful Bring Back Lost Love Spells in are effective within 24 Hours. Losing someone you love is like breaking your heart in two pieces, especially when you are deeply in love with that person. Love is an essential emotion and has power to do everything happy and pleasant, but there comes a time when people are abandoned by their loved ones and are deceived, lied, wrong and blamed. My Bring Lost Lover Back Spells are an art of the ancient Chinese dating a century back of this power love potion that has the universal reciprocal powers turn events and force the vex to return immediately.call Pappa & Mamma Grace on +256763059888 for the power full love spells For all your Love,Family,Relationship,Business,Work and Financial matters. I specialize in various forms of traditional and spiritual healing solutions that may assist you with any challenge you might be facing. I work on the following problems like…..call or WhatsApp +256763059888
(1). Make someone love you,
(2). Radiate true Love<<:""?> (soul mate spell),
(3). Forget and to Forgive,
(4). Faithfulness spell,
(5). Return A Loved One,
(6). Break Them Up,
(7). Stop a Divorce now!
(8). Troubled marriages,
(9). To win your lover & Marry you,
(10). Bad Luck,
(11). Bewitched people,
(12). To win old friendship,
(13). Stop drinking, smoking and using drugs,
(14). Finding and keeping a good job,
(15). Boosting your business and keeping up a good business successfully from one generation to another,
(16). Protection at home
(17). Wealth protection Spells
(18). Aura spells
(19). Marry me spell
(20). Break up spells
(21). Bewitching spells or Bad luck spells
(22). Reclaim my wife spells
(23). Lost Love Spells,
(24). Attraction Spell,
(25). Divorce Spells,
(26). Marriage Spells,
(27). Fertility spells/Pregnancy spells,
(28). Banish a Past Lover Spell,
(29). Making Up Spells,
(30). Mend a Broken Heart,breaking up spell
(31). Powerful Love Spells, (and others).
CONTACT DOCTOR MARTIN TO SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS CALL OR WATSAPP +256763059888 or Email : mamagraceandpapa@gmail.com
Activation Powder & SSD Chemical Solution WorldWide call +256758471138.
ssd-chemical-Solution used to clean all type of blackened, tainted and defaced bank notes. Our technicians are highly qualified and are always ready to handle the cleaning perfectly. Our Chemicals is 100% pure.We sell Chemicals that clean all types of black note or deface note.anti-air breezed powders çand other many products used in cleaning black note. We do offer the best chemicals. call +256758471138 if you are far, we will send one of our technician to come to you and clean all your money. Our Products – Ssd solution,Anti breeze,Black,black money,Cleaning,anti-breeze bank notes,Black Dollar, Activation Powder,black coated notes,Vectrol paste,Cleaning chemical,Tebi-Manetic solution, Defaced currency,Black coated notes,Cleaning black money,super automatic solution, stained money,black market currency,cleaning Black money,Cleaning money,notes, Black Currency Cleaning Chemical,SSD Automatic Solution,Money Cleaning Solution, Black Stain,black money chemical. Please contact us for any assistance Call +256758471138 To All Countries in The World/((Continental))eg:
Europe = United Kingdom, Albania,Andorra,Armenia,Austria,Belgium,Bulgaria,Croatia,Cyprus,Czechia,Denmark,Estonia,FinLand,France,Georgia,Germany,Greece,Hungary,Iceland,Ireland,Italy,Latvia,Malta,Monaco,Netherlands,Norway,Poland,Portugal,Russia,Romania,Spain,Sweden,Switzerland,Turkey,Ukraine,and other countries.
Africa : South Africa,Botswana,Angola,Burundi,Algeria,Djibouti,Egypt,Eritrea,Gabon,Ghana,kenya,Lesotho,Libya,Madagascar,Malawi,Mauritania,Mauritius,Morocco,Mozambique,Namibia,Rwanda,Seychelles,South Sudan,Sudan,Tanzania,Tunisia,Togo,Uganda,Zambia,Zimbabwe ,ETC
North America : United States of America, Canada, Bahamas,Barbados,Costa Rica,Cuba,Dominica,El Salvador,Haiti,Mexico,Panama,Saint Kitts and Nevis,Trinidad and Tobago,Jamaica,Honduras,Antigua and Barbuda ,ETC
South America : Argentina, Bolivia,Brazil,Chile,Colombia,Ecuador,Guyana,Paraguay,Peru,Suriname,Uruguay,Venezuela,ETC
Australia : Micronesia, Fiji, Kiribati, Marshall Islands, Nauru, New Zealand, Palau, Papua New Guinea, Samoa, Solomon Islands, Tonga, Tuvalu and Vanuatu.ETC
Asia : United Arab Emirates/Dubai,Afghanistan, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Bahrain, Bangladesh, Bhutan, Brunei, Burma, Cambodia, China, East Timor, Georgia, Hong Kong, India, Indonesia, Iran, Iraq, Israel, Japan, Jordan, Kazakhstan, Kuwait, Kyrgyzstan, Laos, Lebanon, Malaysia, Mongolia, Nepal, North Korea, Oman, Pakistan, Papua New Guinea, Philippines, Qatar ETC
Antarctica :Argentina, Australia, Belgium, Chile, France, Japan, New Zealand, Norway, South Africa, United Kingdom, United States and USSR).ETC.for more information call +256758471138 or via atallcountries@gmail.com oh check us on https://ssd-solutions.mgx.world